Baking Brothers

David was home last weekend for the beginning of spring break. After staying through the weekend, he left on Tuesday to go down to Florida with his girlfriend, where her family is renting a house for a couple weeks. He wanted to bring a small token of his appreciation for having him, so he decided to make cookies, which I helped him make.

First we made orange zest snowball cookies with grated coconut topping. We quickly learned that making cookies takes more time than we assumed! But when you pop them in your mouth, it is all worth it.

The next cookies we made (one of my personal favorites) were peanut butter cookies with a chocolate kiss pressed in the top of each one. I took the above photo while the cookies were cooling. One of the benefits of making cookies yourself is that you get to eat them while the chocolate is still soft. They were delicious!

I was busy with an appointment the next day when David made the final batch: chocolate chip walnut cookies.

I rarely bake, but it was a good experience, and especially enjoyable doing it with my brother.

A Book-Filled Day

This afternoon I went out to the mailbox to retrieve the mail. Although I had just placed a book order Sunday night, I was hoping that it would have arrived already. I peered in the mailbox, and there it was, a brown envelope addressed to me. I grabbed it, along with the other mail, and scurried back inside the warm house.

Now, getting mail is always cool, and new books always excite me... but put the two together, and it puts a big grin on my face. I love receiving books in the mail. I cut the envelope open, reached inside, and took out my new book on self-hypnosis.

Not long after, I took a ride with David to Barnes and Noble, so he could pick up a cookbook to give to his girlfriend for her birthday (along with a couple other books he has already purchased).

As we looked through cookbooks, I thought back to my experiences with cooking. I made my best dishes when I lived with my then girlfriend Robyn. We were both cooking novices, and I was so excited to learn how to combine different ingredients with various spices. We worked as a team, preparing the food and cooking it, and learning as we went along. We made some delicious dishes, and always enjoyed the process.

When later on I was living alone, I resorted to fast food and taco shops. It just wasn't the same cooking alone, without Robyn.

After some time, David chose a book. He actually ended up buying the first book we looked at, after considering a few others. It was a "quick and healthy" cookbook, with info boxes giving tips on cooking with specific foods. I think it was a good choice for his girlfriend, who will soon be setting out on her own.

When we returned home, supper was almost ready. It wasn't until after dinner that I was able to start reading my new book. I have only had the chance to read the first couple chapters, but it looks like it will be what I was looking for. To derive the maximum benefit from the book, the author explicitly instructs the reader to read the book in order. Of course I want to skip ahead and flip through it haphazardly, but I'll be a good little self-hypnotist-in-training and do as he says! I'm looking forward to reading more.

A Tasty Breakfast

This morning Roby, Mom, David and I went out to breakfast at Roby's favorite breakfast place. It is a small, cozy little restaurant that actually more resembles a coffee shop. On the walls hang paintings by different artists, some oil, some watercolor. The floors, tables and chairs are all wooden, and there is a big counter facing the entrance with a glass display of various delicious-looking baked goods. Behind the counter is an area where all the food is cooked. The owner, who appears to be late twenties/early thirties, cooks, rings up checks, buses tables, and even takes orders when it isn't too busy. I'm amazed at what she pulls off. At one point David dropped a fork, and she heard it fall from behind a corner and called over, "Need a new fork?"

"Yes, please," David replied.

"How did she know it was a fork? I wonder if she can tell by the sound?" I said.

"Maybe that's part of the training," David joked.

Roby and I both ordered the apple crisp French toast that comes with a side of cheesy scrambled eggs. The French toast is covered with cooked apples with granola sprinkled over them, topped with whipped cream and syrup. David and Mom had poached eggs laid on top of spinach, tomato, and English muffin, with potatoes on the side. The food was fabulous. I look forward to going there again.

A Wish for Clarity

Every year on Dad's birthday, Mom would make an icebox cake. So in honor of what would have been my father's 64th birthday today, my mother made one that we ate this afternoon. I believe there are many variations of icebox cake, but the recipe that my father taught to my mother consists of layers of graham cracker, banana, and chocolate pudding, all repeated, and stacked within a baking dish. It is not cooked, but refrigerated (hence the name). It is simple but good.

One of my friends from high school who lives in Boston is applying to graduate programs in Library Science. She knew I was considering doing the same, and emailed and asked me where I was in the application process. I wrote her back a rambling email about how I'm still feeling indecisive about whether I want to be a librarian or not.

How does one really know what career they want? In college I quixotically wanted to be a poet; I never actually knew what job I desired, aside from teaching poetry at a university. Since then I have decided that I am not cut out for the competitive literary and scholarly world. Maybe I should not be focusing on a career at the moment, considering I have not even gone back to work in any capacity as of yet.

Still, a library career is appealing. I would be surrounded by books and learning all day, helping people find information. It seems like a job without too much stress, which is important because I'm not sure how much stress I will be able to handle on a job.

I wish I had some clarity. I guess I just need to take things one step at a time, and see where it takes me. Tomorrow I'll finish filling out the volunteer application. One step at a time...

Delectable Dinner and Dessert

Today Mom was out shopping for Christmas presents, and called home mid-afternoon to ask if I would make some turkey soup for dinner. After I hung up, I diced onions, carrots, and celery and threw them in the pot to saute them with butter and olive oil. Once they were partially cooked, I poured in some chicken stock and let it simmer while I cut up the broccoli and the left-over turkey from the Christmas party. I dumped all that into the pot with some spiral noodles and let it simmer until it was cooked. My family said that it was really good.

After dinner we took some of the remaining wedding cake out of the freezer to defrost. We made coffee, and once the cake was thawed we dug in. The cake is almond flavored, with alternating layers of amaretto and raspberry frosting, covered with a butter-cream frosting. Delicious!

Sushi and the Supermarket

Without my mother here, the food supply has been steadily dwindling down. So today I finally decided to go food shopping. When I entered the store, I noticed that my heart rate was up, and I was feeling slightly anxious. Public places are not always a problem for me, but the supermarket in particular makes me nervous. It is there that I am most likely to bump into people I am acquainted with.

Despite some social anxiety, I made my way through the store picking up items on the list. I was looking for something easy for dinner, and I stumbled across a sushi display. I love everything about sushi- the seaweed wrap covered in rice, the wasabi and soy sauce, the ginger, the chop sticks- everything, except- the raw fish. Problem solved: I picked out a vegetable roll that contained cucumber, avocado and shredded carrots. I think of it as sushi for beginners.

Sushi in cart, I weaved through the rest of the store, picking up what I needed.

When I found the last item on the list, Chap Stick, I started to move toward the checkout and finally ran into someone I knew. I was relieved to see that it was Mrs. C, one of my mother's friends.

"Is that you Mike? I'm not good at picking up faces when people have baseball hats on."

"Hi, Mrs. C, how are you?"

Her son, who is about my age, has bi-polar and also lives at home with his parents. Although I do not know them very well, I feel a connection to their family, since they are dealing with some similar mental health issues.

"Did your mother get married last weekend as planned?" she asked.

"Yeah, it was a nice ceremony. Everything went well."

"Oh, good to hear. You know, you guys are being so good about the whole thing. I know it must be difficult having someone new come into the picture, but it sounds like you and your brothers have been really supportive of your mother, and that's great. Roby really means a lot to her."

"I know," I said. "It's good to see her happy with someone."

"Now, did I hear that you're planning on going back to school for library science?"

"Well, it's not definite yet, but I'm thinking about it."

"I hope whatever you decide to do works out for the best."

"Thank you."

We said goodbye, and our conversation was over. As usual, the chance encounter that I had feared was not nearly as difficult as anticipated.

After getting through the check out line, I pushed my cart outside to the car, and loaded up the trunk with groceries. Mission accomplished.

And my sushi dinner was delicious.

Stars and Peanut Butter

As I stood outside in my backyard, all bundled up, smoking my last cigarette for the day, I looked up at the sky and a faint smile came to my lips. Now that most of the leaves have fallen, I am able to see the stars through the bare branches- something to be grateful for.

I thought about how much more I end up talking and laughing when my brother David is home. It is a good workout for my communication skills. For a long time after the episode I was really quiet and reserved, and talking with David helps shake some of the rust out. We discuss a range of topics, including movies, music, politics, and our lives.

During dinner somehow we got talking about peanut butter balls. The name pretty much says it all: balls of peanut butter, flavored with honey, rolled up with rice crispies for crunch. It is a simple, delicious little dessert that my mother would make when we were kids.

David and I decided to make some, so we drove to the supermarket to get the ingredients. Back home, we measured out the portions, threw it all into a bowl, and mixed it up with a spoon. After shaping little balls out of the mixture we put them in the 'fridge and waited for them to chill.

When they were ready we dove in, each bite bringing back memories of childhood.

Before I sign off, here is the recipe (it's a great thing to make with kids):

3/4 cup dried milk
1/2 cup honey
1/2 cup peanut butter
rice crispies

Mix all the ingredients in a bowl, sprinkling in enough rice crispies to give it some crunch. Form into balls, then chill. Enjoy!